Happiness is a Choice

Isn’t it amazing what lessons you can learn from your children?! We’re supposed to be teaching them and then suddenly, they teach us some profound concept leaving me with my mouth gaping open in shock.

The latest lesson my 4 year old has taught me is that happiness is a choice. He can be very whiny and very quick to tears for little to no reason at times. Eventually my husband and I got fed up with it and would often send him to his room until he could come out with a  happy face.

Boy did he learn quick! This little boy is to the point that as soon as we even mention his room, the tears disappear and he puts on the cheesiest smile possible. Each time he does it I’m shocked at his ability to just switch his mood with little effort and suddenly he’s fine.

And from this, I learn that happiness is truly a choice. We can cry or we can choose to put on a happy face which will lead to happy feelings eventually. We have control over our emotions.

This is the lesson that my 4 year old taught me :).

Blankie Injury

C’s precious blankie suffered it’s first major injury, care of older brother K…

See the hole in the bottom right corner? I knew the day would come that I’d regret trusting K as much as I had with scissors.

C was valiant and stood by blankie’s side while I stitched it up, stroking the corner I wasn’t sewing on. I think I took it harder than he did…he seemed to just think of it as a cool hole for his finger :).

Lesson learned…3 year olds just can’t control their curiosity sometimes.

Tickle Time

I assume, and hope I’m not the only mother who gets impatient with her children. One of the things that drives me most nuts is how K will sit and play in the water instead of washing his hands after going potty. He can stay in there for half an hour if I let him.

Instead of spanking or other punishments which are not effective with him, I have started warning that I am going to tickle him if he doesn’t finish by the time I reach a certain number.

By the time I reach that number, he’s done and giggling, and I have calmed down. If he doesn’t finish, I get to tickle him and everyone ends up laughing even more. It doesn’t always work, but it sure beats being angry or frustrated.

Laughter instead of frustration…that’s what works for me.

It’s OK

As I continue this journey through motherhood, I have come to learn that sometimes it’s ok if I don’t do everything. I love having K help in the kitchen, but there are days when I am in a hurry or I just need that time to myself.

And I have learned that it’s ok to put a gate between me and my children. They play happily while I get done what needs to get done. K can still learn about cooking on days that I have time and energy to teach him, and on days when I don’t, he can learn to be independent and play by himself or with his brother.

I think we are all happier in the end, and that’s a Finer Thing in life.

It’s OK

Before I became a mother, I made myself all sorts of promises as far as what sort of mother I was going to be. One of those was that I would use every opportunity to teach my child(ren), including when we were at the grocery store.

For the past several months, I have ended up leaving the grocery store exhausted, frustrated and grumpy at my children. It always started out so well with me teaching K different fruits in the produce section and him helping put stuff into the cart. By half way into our shopping trip, he’s getting bored and I’m starting to stress.

Though I love spending as much time at home when my husband is home, I’ve come to realize it’s ok to leave one or both of my boys home with hubby while I escape to the grocery store. It takes half the time, leaves me much happier and often gives me one-on-one time with one of my boys.

My children will learn, and it doesn’t just have to be from me. K can learn from grocery shopping every other time I go. He can also learn from time with his Daddy while I’m out with C.

Laughing as I leave the grocery store…that’s a Finer Thing in life and it works for me!

Teaching Kids To Give

In an effort to de-junk, I realized what a ridiculous amount of toys my children have. As I inventoried the toys in their room I realized how rarely they play with many of them and decided their room was next.

I was stressing quite a bit about K's reaction to losing a bunch of toys. I considered having my husband take the boys out for an hour or two, but felt strongly that K needed to be part of this process.

When I told him some of his toys were going bye-bye, naturally he flipped! Oops!

After he had calmed down, I explained to K that some little boys do not have any toys and that we were going to give some toys to other little boys. He embraced this idea and readily took toys and threw them into the giveaway box. As the box grew fuller, K got more excited. It made my heart melt to see how willing he was to give.

Until that box was gone, K regularly reminded me that those toys were for other little boys and he never tried to take any of those toys out of the box.

I often forget how smart my kids are, and how ready they can be to grasp new concepts. I am so thankful that K was willing to share and give to others and hope that we will continue to teach each other such important lessons.

We Are Beautiful

I have always found it amazing how much our own impression of ourselves can affect how we see ourselves. It is like there is a filter over our eyes that prevents us from seeing what is really there. It's like those mirrors in the fun house that distort your reflection.

When my husband and I first started dating, I felt a change within myself. As he told me more and more that he loved me or that I was pretty, my self image began to change. For the first time in my life, I could regularly look in the mirror and see myself as someone beautiful. Because of his love, I was better able to see myself for who I was and love myself.

Since then, I have been pregnant twice and my stomach has suffered greatly. I definitely have that "baby pooch" and constantly find myself sucking it in. After C was born, I was extremely self conscious until one of my friends exclaimed how I looked like I had never been pregnant. After several other friends said similar things, I started seeing myself through their eyes. I realized that my pooch really wasn't that huge, and even if I do have a pooch, I earned it! I put my body through a lot of stress and strain to carry two babies to term, to give them life.

Those tired eyes, the gross hair-I earned those! C had been clingy all week and wouldn't let me put him down. I got nothing done. I was exhausted and he was miserable, but no matter how I looked, all C wanted was me.

He loves me for me as should I.

No matter what faults we find in our bodies, I truly think that in some way or other, we have earned them. They are a reminder of what we have accomplished, or what we have been through. Scars, stretch marks, freckles, pale skin. For some reason or other, our body is the way it is. The best we can do is to take care of the body God so graciously gave us, and treat it as best we can.


Kim at Mom Tried It is encouraging every woman to think about the part of them they dislike most and reconsider. Whether or not you post about it doesn't matter. What you think of yourself is the point. We are beautiful...just ask those who love you most.

Mama Guilt Mondays: Shots

Last week, C had his 1 year well check. At the end, the nurse came in and told me he would need FIVE shots! She asked if I wanted to do them all or space them out, and I said to just get it over with. C has never had too much trouble after his shots so I wasn't particularly worried.

After he had his shots, as soon as I picked him up he stopped crying and I made sure he had some Tylenol to ease the pain. We went shopping after wards and he was totally fine.

That afternoon, after his nap, he started crying and would not stop. He didn't want to be held, which broke my heart, so I put him down and he doubled over. He couldn't crawl or stand up, and just kept crying. I felt so horrible! He was miserable with a fever for four days after his shots.

I've learned my lesson; never again will I have my kids get 5 shots at once! It's worth it to split them up. I still feel bad. Last week was hard! I didn't get anything done because C wanted to be held constantly.

I forget how happy my children are until they get sick and go several days without smiling. C is like a totally different kid from who I saw last week.

A Season and Purpose

"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven"
-Ecclesiastes 3:1

There are so many times that I want to be more; to do more. I want to make clothes for my kids, I want to volunteer here or there, I want a cleaner house. At the end of a long day when I feel like I've accomplished nothing, the above scripture plays repeatedly over in my head.

I have to make a conscious effort to remind myself that to everything there is a season, and the season I'm in right now is entirely focused on two little boys who need my constant attention to teach, nurture and love them. When I am able to keep this in mind, at the end of a long day, when I look at my two little angels sleeping in their beds, I realize I accomplished more than I ever thought possible.

I know that I have done enough when my little boy whispers "I love you mommy" no matter what else I have done that day.

One day, my season will change. My little boy will no longer want me to carry him everywhere. My children will not want me to just sit and cuddle with them. I will have time to do everything else. For now, this is my season, and this is my purpose.

Glutton

As defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary, a glutton is "one that has a great capacity for accepting or enduring something" such as a glutton for punishment.

Hi, I'm Judy, and I'm a glutton for punishment. Why? Here's my story:

While I was working on Bunny & Clyde, I learned the extremely hard lesson that polyester thread is evil, worthless, and a waste of time and money. After spending over an hour on these bunnies, I had to go back and redo everything with cotton thread, because the polyester thread kept shredding and skipping stitches. I made my husband swear that he would never let me use polyester thread again.

What a good husband he is! The other night he randomly looked at me and said "Judy, don't use polyester thread ever again!" He then continued into a list of everything I told him to remind me never to do. Isn't he sweet? At least he remembers, right :)

Tonight, as I pulled out my machine and sat down to sew, I saw all of the polyester thread in my collection and thought, what can it hurt? I cannot throw things that might be somewhat useful away, and my mother-in-law passed her great assortment of thread onto me. I was just mending something that didn't have to look pretty, so it wouldn't matter much. After re-doing, re-threading, re-everything, I finally decided to switch to cotton thread. Guess what? My machine started singing praises to my name and humming the most beautiful melody a sewing machine can hum.

What did I tell you? I am a glutton!

Forgiveness

One of the biggest lessons I've learned since having kids is the concept of forgiveness. It amazes me how quickly little kids forgive and forget. If I bump into K and knock him over accidentally, the first thing he wants is a hug from me. I'm the one who caused his pain or discomfort and he still loves me and trusts me to make it better.

It makes such a difference in my life when I'm able to follow my children's example and forgive as quickly as they do.

All I can say is please don't let silly things like politics ruin your friendships. A woman who was like a second mother to me growing up has estranged herself completely from my family because of politics. She and my mom were best friends for over 20 years and she destroyed that friendship because of politics. It breaks my heart to know that one of the people I thought would always love me can't stand the sight of my family because of the hatred festering inside her.

It's not worth it to foster such anger and hate. I'm so grateful for my kids, and for their ability to teach me such a crucial life lesson!

Oops!

Big oops!
So yesterday, K was sick and throwing up like crazy. I was cleaning up like crazy. My washing machine saw more use in one day than it ever has before.

Finally, the boys are in bed and all I have left is the pillow to wash. The tag says put in another pillow to balance the washer so I start looking around for a pillow. Cue throw pillows. These gorgeous babies came with a couch from my husband's grandmother. It was time for a wash, so in they went.

The washer finishes and I go to open it and just burst out laughing. I must have been certifiably crazy by this point after cleaning up puke and changing millions of diapers (perhaps a slight exaggeration?) because all I could do was laugh. Apparently, the throw pillows are full of foam. Who fills throw pillows with foam anyhow?

Those poor pillows had met their match. The washer tore one of the pillows to shreds. All I could see was a sea of yellow foam.
I think my washer went through identity crisis as I was vacuuming it out, and I wish I had taken a picture before I took the other pillow out; the foam originally covered everything and was all I could see. When all was said and done, the foam filled up half of a kitchen size garbage bag.

I don't think I've fully recovered from the stress of yesterday because I still find it oddly hilarious!